A few things bother me more than when someone who knows nothing tries to tell me who I am.
“You’re a liberal, I’m a conservative, and there’s no chance we’ll ever agree on something (I’ve read your columns)” a disgruntled reader told me recently in an email.
He was unhappy about what he felt was an imbalance of views in The Enquirer’s letters to the editor in general, but specifically on the subject of Roe v. Wade. In his opinion, I was using my editorial authority to deliberately exclude anti-abortion views because as a “liberal,” I am convinced that “conservative opinions are not worth printing.”
This dissatisfied reader, however, conveniently ignores the letters and columns invited by conservative writers that we print, including those of the past that he had written himself. I compare it to those conservative-speaking heads who go to various media platforms and complain about those media platforms that censor or stifle their opinion. Maybe I’m the only one who sees the oxymoron there.
Maybe The Enquirer doesn’t print conservative letters as much as this reader prefers, but if I really believe “conservative opinions aren’t worth printing,” why publish any? Why does The Enquirer invite alternative voices such as Gil Spencer, Christine Marallen, Mack Mariani and Rachel Citak to sit on our editorial board as members of the community?
This is the kind of nonsensical debate we find ourselves caught up in these days in America – and it happens across the political spectrum. We make assumptions about who people are and their motives. We conveniently ignore facts and truths because they do not agree with the narrative we want to believe about the “other side.” We are not interested in an authentic dialogue and find a common ground. We just have to be angry with each other, take cheap shots and fight non-stop. While I try to maintain the faith that reasonable people can come together to form a more perfect union, I am beginning to believe that all we need to do is tear down our shared home.
The truth is, none of us are all one thing – conservative, liberal, good or bad. Most people are incredibly complex individuals living in areas of gray, not black and white. But as Americans, we don’t respond well to gray. American writer and activist James Baldwin once said, “We live in a complex country that insists on being simple-minded.” There are no simple and easy solutions to the problems we face in our country or in the world, for that matter. And people can be enigmatic. To pretend otherwise is a sheet.
For example, the issue of abortion is incredibly complex, with many cases that will continue to emerge that will call for common sense medical decisions, not absolute political positions. As the ordained pastor of a church, I’m “pro-life,” but I struggle with the concept of forcing a woman – and unfortunately in some cases, a child – who has been raped to give birth to her rapist’s baby. Should there not be reasonable exceptions for when the mother’s life is at risk or the child has serious health problems or deformities? Anyone who does not struggle with these questions is not taking the issue seriously.
Moreover, we live in a democratic republic not a theocracy. So while my strong Christian beliefs should guide choices in my life and home, do I have the right to force my religious beliefs on American Jews, Muslims, atheists, or American agnostics? Even God does not. Instead, God has given us one of his greatest gifts – free will, the ability to choose for ourselves.
I also support the right to bear arms. But I’m clouded not only by the mass shooters who made national news, but by the almost daily shots we see in Cincinnati. I know that background checks, bans on assault weapons and firearms in the hands of teachers will not yet stop an individual’s intent to kill others. However, I also know that we cannot sit back, do anything, and see our children and fellow Americans continue to be shot at schools, churches, synagogues, and grocery stores.
Maybe we should try all this – automatic gun bans, metal detectors, background checks, ammunition limits, firearms teachers, more school resource officers, increased health services mental, you know the score. Anything that makes it harder to kill and save lives. Law-abiding citizens and patriots have made sacrifices throughout our history to make our country safer for all.
And yes, the United States needs to take care of immigration. But we must do this with compassion and in a fair way. We cannot welcome refugees from open war Ukraine with open arms while at the same time closing the door closed to Haitian migrants and Mexican asylum seekers fleeing political instability, natural disasters and the drug cartels. Being American is a privilege, and those seeking to come here from other countries must have to comply and follow the rules. But neither can we become so rigid that we do not recognize that there are times when it is appropriate, even humanitarian, to bend those rules to help those in difficulty. America, a nation of immigrants, is best known for building bridges and not walls.
And Black life matters to me too, especially mine and my loved ones. I also know that the police are integral to the safety and security of our communities. If anyone enters my house, I am calling the police. I don’t want to be mistaken for the thief when they arrive and shoot me because I’m a Black man in a beautiful suburban locale, mostly white. I’ve said it before – I’m not against the police, I’m against the bad police. And if you’re not against the bad police too, the problem isn’t me, you. Removing bad actors in police precincts should be as important as removing criminals from our streets.
Respect is a two-way street. The police deserve the risks they take to keep us safe, but they need to give it as well. Instead of removing the funds to the police, let’s better train them to land. And we don’t have to worry about qualified immunity if officials were more qualified to deal with diversity.
These are just some of the awkward, gray areas that require each of us to have the most serious minds, the most honest conversations, and the most open hearts, not just to raise goofy noises or repeat talking points on it. Cable TV
Perhaps our biggest flaw as a nation is our absolutism. The concept that there is only one good perspective and that belongs to my side. This cracks the hubris and is likely to one day result in the fall of our nation unless we change course. Each of us must have the humility and wisdom to understand that what we know is far greater than what we do not know. Avoiding assumptions, keeping an open mind, and being willing to listen and consider other opinions, particularly those that diverge (sometimes wildly) from our own would be keys to fixing our broken nation.
After negotiating a few emails and revealing some personal knowledge with this disgruntled reader, his tone changed.
“I appreciate you sharing this. I didn’t know a little bit of it, and it gives me a slightly different perspective,” he admitted. “I wasn’t looking for a fight. I just get frustrated with the media (press and broadcasting) & amp; mldr; Last but not least, I want the hometown newspaper to stay alive …”
Whodathunkit? Something else this “liberal” and conservative might agree on.
It is amazing the common ground we can find when we are more interested in listening than listening.
Opinion and Engagement Editor Kevin S. Aldridge can be reached at kaldridge@enquirer.com. Twitter: @kevaldrid.
