Napoleon Bonaparte, Leonardo da Vinci, Marie Curie. Or maybe you relate better to their contemporary counterparts – Barack Obama, Oprah Winfrey, Jimi Hendrix. All legendary. All left handed.
For those who have never thought twice about the convenience of notebooks, door handles and corkscrews, the problems of left-handed people probably go unnoticed. Ask any left-handed passer-by, however, and you will quickly come to the realization that life is indeed full of unnecessary hardships for this minority of the population. I, as a member of the right-wing majority, was eager to find out more about it.
In an exclusive interview with THE WEEKLY JOURNAL, a source who asked to remain anonymous recounted his lifelong struggle as a leftist. “It is common knowledge that life is challenging for people with extreme physical and emotional disabilities in a world that caters to ‘normal’ people. I would argue that the second worst thing is to have a disability just small enough to to be forgotten but big enough to affect life,” he said.
As he sat across from me, I observed him struggle to pick up the coffee set in front of him from a narrow-minded, right-leaning waiter. With a sigh, he slid the mug to the other side. It was clearly not the first time this affront had happened.
“It would be a worthy cause for society to fight for a more hand-neutral world: where left-handers don’t have to make micro-decisions and micro-adjustments in everyday life – what instruments can I learn, what sports can I play, why don’t the Shit, the faucets are always so confusing to open, no one wants to fight with me,” he lamented.
The question is, what is it that these left-handed people have that we, right-handed standards, do not? Let’s get into some science.
Control of the body works contralaterally. That is, the right side of the body is controlled by the left side of the brain and vice versa. Additionally, as you’ve probably heard, each side of the brain has its unique strengths. The left side is credited with numbers, science and mathematics, reasoning and logical functions. The right side commands everything pleasantly.
Despite trials and tribulations, many renowned artists and musicians have overcome the challenges of working with tools and instruments made for right-handed folk. The devilishly talented violinist Paganini, the long-fingered Rachmaninov, and the starry night painter Van Gogh are just a few more recognizable names on the long list of talented lefties.
We can unofficially say that the few who are ruled by the right brain (read: left-handed) have significantly improved function in the areas of music awareness, imagination, creativity and intuition. Well, and if you’re still second guessing, just go back to the list of names at the top of this article.
In his final plea, our embittered anonymous source expressed the following: “I understand that life cannot be adjusted to perfection, but what is the point if not to strive for it. I urge you all to work for a more hand-neutral world work – one hand at a time.
On this International Left-Handed Day, celebrated on August 13th, reach out to the left-handed people in your life and ask them what it’s like to be so unappreciated. Oh, and it just happens to be the birthday of this infamous leftist – Fidel Castro.
